if diet works, we would all be thin already

As most of the people around me know, I have had an eating disorder called Bulimia. It was by far the worst thing that has ever happened to me. 4 years ago, I controlled every single thing I eat, constantly starved myself, workout excessively, and also shielded myself from the world. I was so alone and lonely I only had myself. 3 years ago, I told my family about it. Not only it worried them, but they also realised by commenting that I have gained weight was the major factor to my eating disorder, haunted them.

4 years have passed and I am now officially done with it. I realised that mindful eating is the way to lead my life into a healthier person. Healthier in terms of my body, my mind and my soul. I have never stepped foot onto the weighing balance for more than 6 months now. I care so much lesser of my weight now. I am a much happier person in general. I eat whenever I'm hungry, stop whenever I'm full. I eat whatever I want and never control my food intake. I used to binge on food and puke right after. Not only it made me so sick but it also made me so hungry 2-3 hours after the binge. What's the point...

To be honest, if diet really works, everyone would be so skinny right now. The fact that it doesn't work, we should all not worry about diets anymore. Health and happiness are way better than how you look. No one really cares about the way you look. They commented about it because they obviously have nothing better to say to you hence that's the only thing that they can say. Stop worrying about what others have to say but live your life the way you want to.

Tbh, rice is my ultimate favourite food. I used to control my carbs intake because I thought carbs will make me fat. I was totally wrong. Carbs do not make you fat, excessive carbs do. Fats do not make you fat, excessive fats do. Eat till you're satisfied, then stop. Weight goes up and down in life. It's not stationary. Enjoy your chocolate once in a while, it will keep your cravings down. You can always eat lesser after a piece of chocolate, or don't. Your brain will notify you when you're full anyway so eat while you can, enjoy while you're still living.

Now, I get to eat my maggie mee whenever I feel like it. I get to enjoy my fast food whenever I feel like it. Wuuu, and I finally get to enjoy my ice cream! Ah, my life is so worth living now. I'm happier and the happiness I have, I get to spread it to people around me. That's what life is worth living for.


xoxo, E